I NEVER SPEAK ILL OF ANYONE
A few months ago I was working in the back of our van, going through cartons of donated clothing, and listening to the radio. A man was being interviewed who had just written a book about religion and the environment. Back in the 60's he had been a leading social activist. At one point in the conversation, the interviewer tried to bait the man into criticizing a prominent politician. Ever since I heard the man's straightforward response, it has been echoing within me: "I never speak ill of anyone."
This line has been a challenge to me. My first reaction was that I don't speak ill of people either. But the line has continued to haunt me. Can I honestly say that I never speak ill of anyone? I started thinking of politicians and other public figures whom I've criticized. Then I began being conscious of others, closer to my life, whom I have, at times, spoken ill of as well. It wasn't gossip, it wasn't meanspirited, but it was, nonetheless, critical. I've been wrestling with the fact that I do on occasion speak negatively about others.
And yet I continue to be attracted to and challenged by this simple statement: "I never speak ill of anyone." I've been wonder if negative talk can ever be justified? Is it ever really necessary? I've been wondering whether it's valid, or merely a rationalization, to distinguish between criticizing a person and criticizing what he or she has done? Sometimes wrongs, injustices, need to be courageously denounced. But is there ever a justification for denouncing a person? Whenever I denounce a person, and not just their actions, am I not just projecting my own negative feelings about myself onto another?
There is something pure and very right about not speaking ill of anyone. It will not be easy to attain. Bad habits and hangups die slowly. But I do believe it something well worth striving for. I hope this line will haunt and challenge you as it does me. I firmly believe that each of us will be happier people, and our world a better place, when we too, like the man of the radio, can quite spontaneously and truthfully say: "I never speak ill of anyone."
Ronald Stanley, O.P.
For additional articles relating to this topic see:
AFFIRM YOUR NEIGHBOR
EVERYONE HAS THEIR STORY
FORGIVE! ...AND FORGET?
BE RECONCILED!
HATE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOU HATE YOURSELF
WHAT'S IN A NAME?
TRUE HUMILITY
